Classroom Curiosities IV

After the Christmas break, I’m back with more insights from the classroom. Enjoy!

Graphic imagery
In one reading class, a child misread ‘failing eyesight’ as ‘falling eyesight.’ I mimicked what that could mean (dangly eyes) and the children were grossly delighted.

‘J’ is for…
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Anthropomorphism
Students often encounter animals exhibiting human characteristics in literature (especially in Aesop’s fables), and it is important to explain the stereotypical roles they play. I asked my class which animal was said to be wise. One boy exclaimed, “A buffalo!”

Nightmare
I asked my class about whether they could remember their dreams. Many said they imagined flying, running faster than cars and swimming underwater. One student glumly admitted, “I dream of spelling.”

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Apostrophes
I would like a stern word with whoever named this part of punctuation. Not only do the children struggle to say the word itself, they become so liberal with the little flying comma that they sprinkle it everywhere where an ‘s’ appears once they’ve encountered it.

Aged 7, I was guilty of this too. With lots of practice, the primary students begin to understand it is only used for possessives, but the backwards step seems inevitable before they crack it.

PG-rated
When I was marking a 4 year old girl’s homework book in my phonics class, she had correctly circled a ‘mermaid’, recognising it had the same first sound as ‘man’. She said it was her favourite as it “wears a sexy bra”.

Another child was outraged at another student and immediately told on him, saying that he’d said the ‘s’ word. I called both of them over, and tried to stifle a snort when that word was revealed to be ‘selfish.’

Sanitise
Kids love being icky. From sneezing out swinging snot ropes, to picking their nose before giving me a high five, they love to share their germs to my dismay. One lesson, I noticed one of the boys in my class had a huge wet patch on his shorts. When we reached reception, he explained, “It’s just saliva.” Oh, that’s better then…

The struggle is real
RIP jumbo pencil. I hope you enjoyed your three short weeks on this Earth. I tried to save you from excess sharpening, but alas, you perished too soon. You are survived by lime green pencil #2. I have since bought the amazing book, The Day the Crayons Quit to further educate my kindergartners.

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Method acting
I am worried my ‘teacher’s voice’ might be permanent. I often have a stray sticker stuck to the bottom of a foot, and have given up trying to remove the permanent marker which is just part of me now.

Assessments
When a three year old child says ‘daddy finger’, I feel a little pang of sadness saying that it is actually called a thumb. For kids new to phonics, giving the first sound can be challenging. The first sound of tiger is ‘tuh’ for example. It’s sometimes hard to argue with their logic of ‘meow’ for cat and ‘oink’ for pig though…

As a final note, I have introduced our centre to the endless delights of puns. Stay tuned for weekly updates, and feel free to share or leave comments below.

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